Thursday, February 01, 2007

Valley of the Galls - Up in Smoke!

I am one half French and take great pride in what I consider to be my many Gallic quirks. You'll never see me order Freedom Fries! However, when it comes to respiratory health, my hypochondriac, neurotically Jewish other half defiantly kicks in. So, hearing of the French smoking ban controversy only inspires a loud “About time!” yell from me and the urge to book that flight across the pond for April so I’d actually be able to smell the flowers and not the fecal stench of nicotine permeating the air.

As far as this being an assault on “the French character,” I can only say that I’ve never heard of Islamic head scarves causing lung cancer. So I’d argue for lifting that ban and fiercely enforcing this new one.

The French are supposedly one of the most hypochondriac cultures in the world, but maybe if they can kick the tobacco habit they wouldn’t have to take so many pills. I send my plea to my beloved Paris to abandon those stink sticks and send them back to where they belong: North Carolina.

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