Who is Landron?

Conceptual artist Landron will not be celebrating the New Year.

He also does not engage in the argument that the teens begin in 2011 not 2010. The question is both moot and mute to him. Though he would prefer to say that it is mutte, the Catalan word for beige.

"Time is a social construct," he would say and clocks, calendars and sundials should be used only as objets des artes not as guides for behavior and deadlines.

Landron has no deadline for his seminal installation The Shattering of Time which, as he says, "Will be complete when it is destroyed."

We would wish you a happy New Year, but that would upset Landron who says, "The New Year is old even before it is born."

Alert to Grey Line: New Attraction in the Mission

While it's clear that there are three top tourist attractions in San Francisco: Golden Gate Bridge, the Giant Sundial and Alfie's Troll Altar, I have lately noticed one that might be number four on the list. Though the displays lack Alfie's Vegas extravaganza panache, the apartment building at the northwest corner of 21st and South Van Ness has got some pretty groovy stuff going on.

Check the unit on the third floor, west end and look up. Not sure what all is up there, but it looks pretty dern good.

My Kastle for a Klennex

Before California statehood and the incorporation of San Francisco, the U.S. Pacific coast was made up of feudal kingdoms and feuding warlords. Evidence of this includes the giant moat between the Kingdom of Oakland and the Duchy of Potrero Hill that we now call the San Francisco Bay.

Less well known are the remaining castles of the warlords, some of which have stayed in the same families for centuries such as the Duke of Ulloa who maintains Hearse Castle which Bryce Digdug and I recently discovered when we make our journey to pay homage to the giant sundial of San Francisco.

Now another castle -- from the Fiefdom of Albion -- is for sale, all six stories. Not to be missed are its "hand-hewn caverns". I've no idea if Hearse Castle has hand-hewn caverns, but it's hard not to believe that a castle surrounded by hearses doesn't have something buried beneath.

At only $2.95 million, Albion Castle is surely the best dollar-value fiefdom currently on the market.