This Offer Will Not Be Repeated
Bunter and I received this in today's mail. We're not sure yet what we'll do with it. Just in case you're curious, we dummied our address on the label to protect our privacy. As those who've been to see us know, we live on Garbage Lane, not Trash Avenue.
Labels: evangelicals, junk mail, mail, religiion
posted by Ladrón de Basura (a.k.a. Junk Thief) @ 6:52 PM
10 comments
10 Comments:
OMG, I got one exactly like that a few years ago. It only looked like Jesus' eyes were closed, but they actually glowed in the fucking dark.
Long story short, I won the Powerball four days later.
When they talk about God's house, they mean HOUSE.
That was very thoughtful of someone, wasn't it?
Maybe they'll send you that young, virile Spanish houseboy you've surely been dreaming of...or the complete Criterion collection. Gifts untold await you...no doubt.
Dave - I actually got one a while back. Yours may be arriving soon. Expect more rewards.
Huntington - HOUSE? No shouting aloud in comments here.
Jill - Yesterday Oprah gave her audience a boxed set of all 25 Tom Cruise movies as they screamed with delight. The only thing that would make me happier than having those is to score some Ritalin.
That Jesus image is just plain creepy. They need to use a more inviting J.C.
WAT - It makes me glad that I'm a Jew.
Whom or what ever sent this is clearly confused. They address it to you yet the contents are clearly for someone named "Jesus." Why did they send the card to you when clearly this "Jesus" fellow, whoever he is, should be getting it? And what is "blessing"? If it is what I think it is these people are sick! I blessed an indian rug after an all night bender. I didn't even know I did it until I woke up the next (or perhaps the next after next) morning.
Gavin - I get similar blessings on the side of my car and building most weekends by guys named Jesus.
I had to go back and comment on this because just last week I received the same letter. I held onto it for a couple of days because I was worried that throwing it away might disrupt the flow of positive Karma. What I found most amusing about it was how freely and unapologetically they used bad english in the name of the Savior, Lord Jesus Christ.
Mark - May the Lord be with you. Besides bad grammar, there's that wacky 1950s Biblical clip art. Maybe you should forward yours to Sharon Stone since Karma has come back to bite her backside this week.
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