Wednesday, April 06, 2011

One Week

This afternoon, at 4:45, marks the one week point when I said goodbye to Bow in this world. It hurts a tiny bit less each day. I am continuing all of my rituals and plan to walk up to the spot where we parted a week ago this afternoon.

Last night I attended a pet loss support group. Some people have been going for two years or more. Others felt grief so tremendous they could not speak. For once I was able to hear other people's life stories and their pets' without judgment. There was an element of my grief in each of them and an element of the love and joy as well.

Having made it a week, I don't plan to continue my daily posts about this loss nor to close the chapter on life with Bow. She will continue to make an appearance here, but not with such immediate, raw grief. I don't want "closure" but only to honor the grief and move forward with her where she needs to be in my heart, knowing I am forever changed by her. She was one of the greatest teachers ever to enter my life.

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At 10:57 AM, Blogger Celeste Bergin said...

Hi Ladron, I remember times when I grieved the loss of a pet many people acted as if it should be a small matter. It feels wrong to be "dismissed" like that, so I am glad you found the group. You can handle this however you see fit! I know you know that it is very much an up and down process. As far as I am concerned I will always be happy to see posts about your beloved friend.
I want to share something with you that touched me so much. I overheard a vet tell someone: "They stay with you until they know you're going to be all right".
This was directed to someone who was hurting over the loss of the physicality of their dog...and it was coming from a "scientific" person. It moved me, because I know I often felt my pets "around me" and as time went on it became different. I am kind of a science type myself....but I do definitely go for that rainbow bridge thing. I know your Bow is there, but also right next to you too. Hugs to you---I love this photo. :)

At 3:17 PM, Blogger Gregg Biggs said...

Celeste - There is no reason not to grieve the loss of a pet. All life is sacred. I went to a pet loss support group. Two women have been going for over two years, one was distraught over the death of a rat and was feeling guilty for being in such grieving. I came away with deep respect for all of them and was reminded of the importance of not judging anyone's grief.

At 4:34 PM, Blogger Celeste Bergin said...

Thanks Ladron...I think I would love to paint that photo!

At 6:03 PM, Blogger Gregg Biggs said...

Celeste - If you decide to paint something from that or other photos of her, I would be hugely touched and honored! Just let me know.

At 11:35 AM, Blogger Gary said...

It has been a month since I said good-bye to my loving pup. I have tried to write about her on FYB but there is just too much swirling around in my head in relation to this loss that I can't seem to articulate how I feel. Maybe one of these days I'll give her a proper tribute but in the meanwhile it has been comforting somehow to read about Bow. I am so sorry for what you are going through. But I keep thinking about that phrase about loving and losing being better than never loving at all. I do believe that.

At 4:56 PM, Blogger Ladrón de Basura (a.k.a. Junk Thief) said...

Gary - So sorry to learn that you've been through the same thing too. It was heartbreaking, but I keep remembering all that she taught me. I thought I could never love and be loved unconditionally, and she proved that I still could. I still feel that in my heart, and I know there is reason to be hopeful.


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