Who is Landron?

When conceptual artist Paul Reubens encountered legal problems in a fine arts cinema in Florida in the early 1990s, he immediately called fellow conceptual artist Landron from his bail bondsman's office.

"What film was showing when you were arrested," Landron inquired.

"The Sorrow and the Pity," Reubens replied.

Landron suggested that Reubens call Doris Duke. Duke funded Landron's 1987 exhibition The De-Monetization of Money on Wall Street at the time of that year's stock market crash and the premier of Oliver Stones movie of the same name. Landron projected images of bank notes from more than 80 countries on the Morgan Stanley, Smith Barney and other financial institutions' buildings. At midnight, 300,000 Deutsche Marks were dropped from the top of the stock exchange as thousands of people grabbed for them while Polaroids and 80-pound SONY mini-camcorders captured the insanity. Many of the photos were published the next day in the New York Post with the names and home addresses of those grabbing the bank notes.

Landron said that he did not object to people having access to the monetary value of these notes, but he was appalled that there was no mention of the portraits of the people on the bank notes. Landron felt that it was especially important to acknowledge that while US bills show images of monuments and dead presidents, German currency presents the likenesses of authors, scientists and musicians. The fact that the 1000 Deutsche Mark shows the Brothers Grimm is a testament to the fable of money itself.

The entire exhibition cost around $30 million, and Doris Duke invested $55 million. When her foundation called and suggested that an audit might be in order, Landron said that this was a mere nihilistic capitalist construct and slammed down the receiver. Doris called him the next day, apologized and flew him to her retreat. They had cocktails and bree on her veranda.

After Landron had given Reubens Doris' private number, he asked, "When I call, should I say that I am Pee Wee Herman or Paul Reubens?"

Outraged, Landron shot back, "If you have to ask that, you don't know Doris."

The next day, Reubens arrived at Doris' mansion with a great, private reception and kisses. Which name did he use? As Landron would say: "You do the math."*

* = Math is a social construct.

Corey Bleu. Cory Blue. 1980s. Jeans. Boys. Boxes

There were a lot of Coreys and Corys and Cories and bad hair and bad jeans (acid wash, stone wash) in the 1980s. But I would like to say a few words of praise for the Quebec sensation Corey Hart. Schmaltz, oui, but I had the same exact haircut in 1985, as did just about every boy I chased. And Corey really exemplifies why blue jeans were made for the male body. Just Saying. Enjoy.

I Want the Prime Rib Buffet and Bobby J

Another great find through a tip from Gavin Elster. This is almost like the male bookend to that wonderful Samantha Sang video from a few days earlier.

Sadly, I must admit that I missed Bobby J the first time around. Though back in 1984 I got hit on by several guys who looked just like Bobby J. Wait, there is something very familiar about the swaying of his hips.

So, what's your theory on Bobby J? I can easily picture him working as a car loan officer as some lowly branch bank, buys his duds through International Male's catalog and has been pursuing his Euro Disco career at night. I hear that he's a smash in Jersey Boys at the Ray Stevens Theater in Branson, Missouri.

What's your theory?

So She's Still Out There

I was transferring my LP soundtrack to Edith et Marcel tonight, wondering whatever happened to Mama Béa (a.k.a. Béatrice Tékielski), and dang if she doesn't have her own site. It seems no question goes unanswered these days.

What Are You Looking At? Nuthin'!

There are movies, and then there is Rent-a-Cop.

The One Band That Always Makes Me Feel Like I'm Heading to the Food Court After Shopping at Chess King and the Wild Pair

Memories of Mental Health Past

Thanks to Gavin Elster for leading me to this 1982 employee orientation video for the Camarillo State Hospital that closed more than a decade ago and has since become a university campus.

It's easy to laugh at the huge lapels on the polyester blazers, the monotone delivery and generally inept presentation. But it's also rather fascinating to get a glimpse of mental health history and wonder what happened to the 4,000 plus clients and employees who were watched over by the CEO. His mannerisms remind me of Norman Neal Williams as portrayed in the first installment of the BBC's treatment of Tales of the City.

It's easy to see this man as the villain in some slasher movie telling each of his victims with the same detached, nasal droning voice, "You made me do it. You made me do it." It's a bit disturbing that a CEO would have to refer to a script to describe what his hospital does. Some of the comments for former clients on the YouTube page for this series suggest it was a very traumatic place to live.

Watch and then take a valium.

Christmas in June

As if the show itself weren't enough, there's a Crazy Eddie's commercial at around 7:35.

坂本龍一!

YMO is reuniting!

* Yellow Magic Orchestra
* ムーンライダーズ
* スチャダラパー
* Chara
* LOVE PSYCHEDELICO
* pupa
* Y.Sunahara
* ASA-CHANG&巡礼
* グラノーラ・ボーイズ
* mi-gu
* コトリンゴ
* 相対性理論
* and more...

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* 親子チケット(大人1名・子供1名) ￥9,000(税込)
* ※チケットはすべてレジャーシート付
* ※未就学児童無料

チケット発売日
5月31日(日) AM10:00〜
チケット料金

* ブロック指定 ￥8,500(税込)
* 小学生 ￥1,050(税込)
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* ※チケットはすべてレジャーシート付
* ※未就学児童無料


チケット発売日
5月31日(日) AM10:00〜
チケット料金

* ブロック指定 ￥8,500(税込)
* 小学生 ￥1,050(税込)
* 親子チケット(大人1名・子供1名) ￥9,000(税込)
* ※チケットはすべてレジャーシート付
* ※未就学児童無料

We All Had Lapses of Judgment in 1980

Perhaps if Leni Riefenstahl had been on hand to direct things might have gone differently.

You're Not My Father

Hypnotic. Learn more here.

Some Things from the 1980s Actually Get Better

While some wily skags like Madonna become increasingly annoying with the onset of age and exist simply to produce product in order to buy Manhattan and London condos, babies and husbands, there are some performers from the 1980s who actually get better and more wonderfully weird and endearing with the passage of time. Ladies and gentlemen, I present the glory that is Nina Hagen.

Those still reeling from the loss of Eartha Kitt may take comfort in the Germanic purr of Fraulein Hagen on these old chestnuts.

Cocteau, Mormons and Crashing Ceilings

Weren't people dancing in the streets of the Castro and on Valencia barely a week ago? Did the honeymoon last 12 hours of 24? Or did Proposition 8 cancel out all of it?

I try to read Angels in America again every couple of years or cheat and watch part of the DVD as I have done tonight and try not to think too much about my friend Franz collapsing in the lobby of the Walter Kerr in May of 1993 as he kept repeating "Don't worry, you're moving to California just like the characters in the dream sequence." I've never been a Mormon but had an unsettlingly polite house mate and a number of second and third cousins who have been. There always seemed to be something sinister lurking beneath the calm waters.

Boogie Man

Did anyone else take time to watch last night's broadcast on on Frontline of Boogie Man: The Lee Atwater Story? It is a complex portrait of a reptile whose deathbed confessions are also suspect as a final act of showmanship. Yet, at the same time, the final images of him are harrowing, and then we see sewer maggots such as Strom Thurmond and James Baker speaking at his memorial, but then we see James Brown in the audience. Something tells me that even if a similar cancer overtakes the carcas of Karl Rove he won't find a similar reconciliation with guilt. It's much easier to see him playing a game with his ghosts the way Roy Cohn does in Angels in America. And, yet, I suspect the ghost of Lee Atwater is out there, planning not just for the White House in 2012 but smaller races in 2010 and even smaller ones between now and then.

Interactive Thursday: Back to School with Junk Thief

One of the best things about Photoshop and similar software is that you can pull out all your old yearbooks and make porno videos with all the macho jerk jocks that tormented you in your teen years and have them play your submissive, begging, insatiable costars. Well, so I've heard from people who do that sort of thing. (Ahem.)

On a much more wholesome note, you might want to run your own face through the software at Yearbookyourself. My favorites are the ones with the ever so caviler spectacles since that's pretty much what the real thing looks like.

Since Tugboat Dave is in the Caribbean, we're doing our own photo challenge here and asking you to take the Junk Thief dare and run your mug through this program. Or be really brave and show us your actual senior photo.

More '80s Hair

Since my video from yesterday generated such excitement, shock and disgust at the sight of my 1980s hair, I thought I'd share this treasure trove from the archives I continue to cull this week: My official 1983 Haircut 100 Calendar. Don't get your hopes up, this baby won't be showing up on eBay anytime soon. Bribe me, and I might show it to you but with the drapes down in case anyone is peeking in the windows and might rob me.

Junk Thief - Without Lines or Puffiness

Hard as it may be for our younger readers to believe, once Junk Thief was not the grizzled, obese old troll that you now see on this site. He was once a perky young sprite (having earlier been a perky young sprout). As we sort through hours of archive video from the late 1980s and early 1990s, we thought we'd post this little clip from November 1989, nearly 20 years ago, in which Junk Thief gives a demonstration of the audio equipment on his then cutting edge Hi-8 Sony videocam. This is surely the most riveting 67 seconds ever committed to video. It will likely show up in the extras on the five disc Criterion release Junk Thief: The Early Years.

The Thin Line Between Tawdry and Tawny

Ain't this internets thang funny with how one random mention will lead you to a new, unexpected discovery? Huntington's comment on my "Tawdry" entry led me to search "Tawdry Kitaen" with led me to 1980s "model" and Whitesnake music video skank Tawny Kitaen and the above mug shot after her arrest for beating up her husband. It's on a too cool website called Strange Police.

Interactive Wednesday: Many Happy Returns of the 1980s

As the good uncle, I took my niece to see most of the Care Bears and Strawberry Shortcake movies and events in the 1980s. Thus, I have an almost unhealthy knowledge of these Reagan era icons. Fortunately I have no family members of the age that would require gaining a similar knowledge of Hannah Montana. When will there be a Lala Utah? So I'm not sure how I feel about Ms. Cakes' recent makeover, and I'm certainly not happy about her dumping her cat Custard for a cell phone. I think the best indirect reference to her in a pop tune was this one.

Please weigh in.

Now That You've Let Me Get Started

Okay, not all of these are that obscure, but they usually were good for upsetting folks who would show up at my house with a magnum of Riunite and a bucket of KFC back around 1983. Let's just say I opened a few eyes to the world beyond the Midwest. Thus, we delve into the vinyl vaults here at the JunkPlex to recreate a summer evening around 1983.

As the wife of the founder Michael Zilka, Cristina Monet was sort of the Norma Shearer of ZE Record and the whole No Wave movement. She first put out a self-titled disc that was panned with its sort of disco parodies. For years her take on "Is That All There Is" was banned by the authors but is now on iTunes as is her seminal "Things Fall Apart" that many rank as the greatest Christmas song of all time. Today, I hear, she writes scholarly articles about the era, sort of a Louise Brooks of the early 1980s. I offer:
"Don't Be Greedy" from Cristina (1980)
and
"She Can't Say That Anymore" from Sleep It Off (1984)

It's no secret that Junk Thief has a thing for J-Pop and Japanese boys, though not the thin fragile types but more the tough guy detectives of the Mishima mold. But even more than that ilk of J-men, there are the early '80s punk bands, and none top the wonderful Plastics. Nothing is hotter than a manic J-boy screaming obscenities in broken English over a raunchy guitar riff. Enjoy.
"Cards" from Welcome Back (1980)


People grew to tire of August Darnell and his various incarnations, and by the late 1980s and many people dismissed his back up singers The Coconuts as vapid no talents that could shake their booties well but added nothing to the music. They did, however, put out a pretty cool live disc that included "Ticket to the Tropics" that Cristina also covered. The tune offered here is worth giving them a bit more attention in my opinion. Not deep, but damned fun.
"Naughty Boy" from Please Don't Take My Coconuts (1983)


Though their definitive song is definitely "I Love a Man in a Uniform", I also loved The Gang of Four's Hard, which many saw as a sell out. For many it sounded as if they'd gone the route of Bowie's dreadful Let's Dance. To me, there is no comparison. What do you think?
"Is It Love" extended dance mix from Hard (1983)

Maybe they're not that obscure, but I'm surprised that many people have never heard of this band, although their signature tune has been played at many sporting events. I remember it as the ultimate dance tune at certain downtown, late night haunts. Nothing spells a good party more than Pigbag. Never danced to Pigbag? You're life is a fraud!
"Papa's Got a Brand New Pigbag" from the (1981)

Now that we're in a downtown instrumental groove, let's move on to Liquid, Liquid whose "Cavern" was featured in the film Downtown 81 but is best known for supplying the famed base line in Grandmaster Flash's "White Lines". This is one of their lesser known tune but proof of their diversity.
"Groupmegroup" from Liquid, Liquid (1981)

Bangles, Bananarama and any other host of 1980s girl groups pale to this, my favorite of the decade. Sadly, their best known hit was a throw away cover of "Iko Iko" on the Rain Man soundtrack, a movie I never saw mainly because it featured Tom Cruise. This, however, is what I consider to be their best tune.
"Sign of the Times" from The Belle Stars (1982)

Dinah Washington is always welcome at any Junk Thief event. She topped Hank Williams in this lively, joyous cover of one of his best known tunes with superb ad libs and fun harmonies. It feels so fresh that it makes me think it was recorded this week.
"Hey Good Looking" from The Complete Dinah Washington on Mercury Vol. 2 (1951)


Since we're going back a few years, I have to post a favorite tune from Cass Elliott's solo career. Her cover of the only hit by Hurricane Smith is a reminder that she was less flower child than old time club room performer, but she put her own stamp of verve on this version from this album that is very hard to fine but worth the search album.
"Oh Babe, What Would You Say" from The Road is No Place for a Lady.(1972)

And now (gasp) a "show tune" but not in the conventional sense. Two Gentlemen from Verona had book by John Guare and Mel Shapiro, lyrics by Guare, and music by Galt MacDermot, who wrote the same for Hair. Raul Julia headed the cast, and there was this wonderful little tune sung by Diana Davila that sums up my feelings on romance these days. Not exactly I've Grown Accustomed to Your Face.
"I Am Not Interested in Love" from Two Gentlemen from Verona - Original Cast Recording (1971)

What did a bunch of art school punk kids from Boston know about country music? Did it matter? Rubber Rodeo did a fun take on "Jolene" and were a sight to be seen, and I saw them live once at a seedy bar in St. Louis.
"She Had to Go" from She Had to Go (1982)

I know nothing about this "band" except this one hard-not-to-like-because-it's-so-inane single. My niece was about four at the time, and we'd sing it together in my car that summer even when a sun baked cassette dragged the tape at about 22rpms. I knew she was pretty cool back then, because she'd turn to me and say, "I know that they're not singing about my Strawberry Shortcake." Anyone else remember this one?
"Sweepstakes" from Nursery School 12-inch single (1983)

Personally, I preferred Fun Boy Three's tune "The Tunnel of Love" over this GoGos staple, but it was always fun to put it on to see people's reactions as something that initially sounded so odd suddenly turned into something as familiar as salt. A nice downbeat vibe to piss off any Huey Lewis and the News fans of the time.
"Our Lips Are Sealed" from Waiting (1983)

Despite her annoying "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree", I think Brenda Lee is one of the most under-rated early female rockabilly acts. She had volume, energy, verve and more range than many people give her credit for, having also recorded in Italian and German and having played a key role in the early career of the Beatles. I just love this song because it has such a feel of a little Texas girl all dressed up, able to sing with an orchestral back up but still has a bit of country holler in her voice. I especially love her "your little mama" self reference near the end.
"Baby Won't You Please Come Home" from Reflections in Blue (1969)

And finally...not exactly what I'd call a chill out record, but a reflective way to end an evening. Jon Hassell is technically a jazz trumpeter, but he makes Miles Davis sound like Doc Severeson by comparison. His distortion of the instrument and what he called his "Fourth World" recordings that brought together traditional indigenous music with his own retooling in the studio produced sounds that freaked out many of my friends, but pieces like this brought me serenity.
"Dream Theory" from Dream Theory in Malay (1981)