Apocalypse in Progress - World Ends at Midnight

I was in the Castro last night and standing outside of the 440 Castro bar was a fag in typical denim and leather drag and...red Crocs. I almost bumped into a couple of people as I turned to do a double take. I needed to confirm that the red at the bottom of my eyes was not some freak hemorrhaging. No, my body functions were all nice and healthy, but his fashion sense was not. I couldn't even give him the benefit of the doubt that he was a local resident who'd just stepped out for a second to take a break from gardening to check his mail. After finishing his cigarette, he walked into the bar as I made my way down the street.

It's in both the Bible and the Book of Mormon that the final sign of the apocalypse is that you will start seeing fags in red Crocs and Creed T-shirts. The world is over. See you in the afterlife.

Fag Science

Straight man on the left, gay man on the right

So how's your scientific gaydar? According to this article in New York magazine, you can tell a person's sexual orientation by the whorl on the back of the head or the length of the index finger. Submitted for your judgment at the end of this post are the aforementioned entities of JunkThief. There doesn't seem to be any mention of the meaning of a particularly protruding cowlick.

Get back to me quickly on this one since I have to choose between that hunky stud or the chick in the Daisy Duke's for the Fourth of July barbecue.

Gay men are more likely than straight men to have a counterclockwise whorl.







The JunkThief "whorl"
















The JunkThief hand

Colour Me Something

Is it homophobic or self loathing to simultaneously laugh and wince at a hideous queen getting away with just shy of murder while sucking up pints of vodka? That was the queasy feeling I got about 2/3rds of the way through Colour me Kubrick this evening. I really didn't get a chance to discuss it in any detail with my non-date (okay a fig). It was at the 2/3rds point that the various tricks and over-acting seemed to come crashing back, though it almost redeemed itself in the final minutes with Ken Russell impersonating a man deluded into thinking he was Ken Russell throwing Jello in the air. And then there was just the thrill of cameos by Honor Blackman and Marissa Berenson. I'll sleep on it, but I think I will have long forgotten the film by the morning. It was just like a bottle of cheap champagne that is frothy, sweet and forgotten even before your head hits the pillow.

A Date? At My Age I'd Settle for a Fig!!!!

The slides show starts over here.

Ann Coulter -- Hag or Fag Hag?

Not even a week after calling John Edwards a fag hag, it turns out Ann Coulter is hanging out with the real thing. One Marine Corps reservist and Columbia University student Cpl. Matt Sanchez has been making the conservative talk shows recently complaining that he has been attacked by leftist student groups for his military service. He was at the Conservative Political Action Coalition event last week where Coulter made her infamous remark and reportedly posed with him for the above photo. Fair and routine enough, but it appears Sanchez did share with Ann, Bill O'Reilly and other right wing pals some of his previous gigs. Not that JunkThief regularly follows that sort of thing, but he had a flourishing career on the DVD and VHS rental circuit under the name of Rod Majors and made such high toned flicks as Jawbreaker, Donkey Dick, and Glory Holes Of Fame 3, using his often reported "11-inch uncut monster cock" to burn a few memories. f Well, JunkThief thought that face and, uh...voice were familiar. But his film work featured much simpler words. An evolving account of this is evolving over at the great joe.my.god site, and it will be interesting to see how it evolves. "Sanchez" has launched his own blogger site and MySpace site. If, in fact, it turns out to be true that he was attacked by a group of campus socialists at Columbia, he has a right to speak out and ask for action from the administration. And he does not necessarily have an obligation to details his sexuality or porn career when taking on this new issue. However, to suddenly cozy up to people as rabidly anti-gay as Coulter and O'Reilly is where a line is drawn. Just when it seemed all the Republican closet doors had blown open, Cpl. Sanchez's case suggest there are many more still in hiding.

So it will be interesting to see where this goes from here. Maybe Matt can invite Ann for a coffee date to go check out the next sale at Barney's or the matinee of Grey Gardens.

UPDATE: The story has since made it onto MSNBC's Countdown as well as Salon.com where he wrote a rather wimpy letter, admitting his past but defending his present.

UPDATE: And it just keeps getting freakier. With a USMC investigation underway, Sanchez's website just keeps gettin' stranger.

Coulter Recants...Sort Of

Though engaging in dialogue with Ann Coulter is like playing ball with a rabid dog, it's hard not to at least acknowledge her recent implication she made that John Edwards is a "faggot." Coulter, pictured right at a press conference where she spoke about the supposed verbal slip, is rare evidence of a transgendered M to F (or is it the other way around or just plain MF?) who still manages to be a prick. Coulter told the New York Times the remark was meant as a joke. "I would never insult gays by suggesting that they are like John Edwards," she said. "That would be mean." To borrow from the old Truman Capote about Jacqueline Susann, I'd call Coulter a crack whore but I don't want to insult the crack whores. After all, unlike Ann they're just trying to make an honest dollar.

Molene - The Legend Returns

Have I happened to mention the huge concert on New Year's that my dear friend Molene Jackson is putting on? Her first in, well...a while.

Tickets sold out 90 seconds after of going on sale, and one poor matron from Rye, New York, was trampled to death in all the hub bub surrounding the release of the tickets. I've heard that some tickets have shown up on eBay for $10,000 but I question how long they will last.

I've known Mo since 1980 when she was working in a catheter factory. She now works in a dairy products factory but is still an eternal legend all the same. I just feel honored to have been able to have helped with this little video promoting the concert.