Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Apocalypse in Progress - World Ends at Midnight


I was in the Castro last night and standing outside of the 440 Castro bar was a fag in typical denim and leather drag and...red Crocs. I almost bumped into a couple of people as I turned to do a double take. I needed to confirm that the red at the bottom of my eyes was not some freak hemorrhaging. No, my body functions were all nice and healthy, but his fashion sense was not. I couldn't even give him the benefit of the doubt that he was a local resident who'd just stepped out for a second to take a break from gardening to check his mail. After finishing his cigarette, he walked into the bar as I made my way down the street.

It's in both the Bible and the Book of Mormon that the final sign of the apocalypse is that you will start seeing fags in red Crocs and Creed T-shirts. The world is over. See you in the afterlife.

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4 Comments:

At 9:18 AM, Blogger kusala said...

Here's another "benefit of the doubt" hypothesis: Maybe he was a chef who just got off duty and didn't have the presence of mind to change into something more worthy of public view?

I'm toying with the idea of a pair of black Crocs -- the kind without the holes -- but I still am not sure. It still bothers me when my best friend wears her turquoise ones anywhere other than grocery shopping, and she does, on weekends, frequently. But usually not after sundown.

 
At 11:01 AM, Blogger Junk Thief said...

Kusala, I'm sure you've got the stuff to carry off those black, holeless Crocs. However, anyone wearing them in bright colors after dark and trying to carry off a "butch" look (no matter how affected it might be) deserves the ridicule she or he might suffer.

 
At 12:40 PM, Blogger Gavin Elster said...

I would rather be seen in public with kleenex boxes on my feet.

 
At 12:45 PM, Blogger Junk Thief said...

Gavin, I'm with you on this one. Klennex boxes have stood the test of time. Crocs, we can all pray, will die a bitter death soon.

 

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